The Teaching Mum

A light-hearted look at parenting through the eyes of a very busy English Teacher.

Parenting Rapped Up!

8 Comments

To be rapped loudly to the theme tune of ‘The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air’ (the unedited version.)

Now this is a story all about me,

How my house became a mess and why I’m always grubby,

And I’ll like to take a minute just sit right there,

‘Cos I’ll show you how to master the CBeebies blank stare.

In lovely West Yorkshire, I spend most of my days,

Cleaning, not sleeping and dozing in soft plays,

No chilling or relaxing, it’s taxing, not cool,

Wading knee deep in ball pools, I look like a fool.

Then a couple of mums see me stuck on the slide.

“Scootch on down!” they say, but it’s no good I’ve tried.

I managed one sip of tea before my kid got scared,

He got stuck in a net and shouted at anyone who cared.

Soft play hell – don’t forget your socks!


My daughter begs and pleads for something every single day,

For toys and sweets and her own goddamn way.

She shouts and screams so she gives me no choice,

Out come the big guns: my loud teacher voice.

She cries and on my cheeks she’s suddenly a kissing, 

I grab my keys to the car and ask her which Barbie she’s missing.

She’s crying because she is lost…in a maze!


I praise those mommas who have braved having a third,

Just how many more years do you want covered in turd?

Some mornings I wake and think I could do it again.

But then I think nah forget it, I prefer myself sane.

I pull up to my house about seven or eight,

I’ve been at parents’ evening and you’re telling me they’re still bloody awake!

But, then I look over at my babies and I love them to their bones 

Now please go to bed so I can watch ‘Game of Thrones’!

My babies

#Peaceout

#90sTeen

Advertisements

8 thoughts on “Parenting Rapped Up!

  1. This cheered me up on a dreary Saturday morning!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. This is amazing! Funny and so true! Made me giggle as I read it whilst making the tea. My kids are looking at me strangely!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. hehehe! That is awesome….It made me laugh out loud.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. We absolutely love this! Cheered the entire office up!

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s